One Orphan

When we first met Children's HopeChest, we watched One Orphan:

Here, some young orphanage graduates share some of what their lives were like before the orphanage and some of the challenges of leaving the orphanage on their own. Their family experiences were painfully devastating, and their stories are familiar. In 1998, Human Rights Watch reported that 95% of children in orphanages have living parents, meaning these children bear the scars of knowing a parent is either unable, unfit, or unwilling to care for them. It's a lot for any heart to take.

We talk a lot about adoption. The best place for a child is in a safe and nurturing family, and adoptive parents have one of the most important and wonderful jobs on earth. But despite attempts to increase adoption within Russia, a very small percentage of the nearly 4 million orphaned or abandoned children are adopted.

I have heard some stories of what it means to be an orphan in Russia. I have heard that in Russia, a child's soul comes from his or her mother. If a child doesn't have a mother, the child doesn't have a soul. I have heard that in order to abandon your child, you must have 'bad blood.' If your mother had bad blood, you must also have bad blood. You hear Natasha sharing that she used to feel like the 'trash of society.'

This is why HopeChest focuses on relationships. No amount of financial aid alone can save a child from the dire future that awaits orphanage graduates in Russia. The statistics translate into real stories. HopeChest staff has lost children and young adults to violence, drugs, crime, prostitution, and suicide. But they have also seen children discover who they truly are, who they were created to be. They have nurtured children toward healing and healthy, restorative relationships. Our children begin to understand that they are valuable, important, loved and treasured.

The young adults speaking in the One Orphan video have changed their lives with the love and guidance of HopeChest staff and sponsors. They now work with Fund Nadezhda (HopeChest in Russia) to share their hope with other children in the orphanage systems, showing them that they have choice, that their future can change.

Beyond orphanage sponsorship, HopeChest works in Ministry Centers and Family Centers. The Ministry Centers are a gathering place for orphanage graduates, where they can maintain contact with friends and mentors as they are out on their own or in tech school. The Family Centers are independent living, where the graduates live with or near each other under the supervision of healthy adults. We believe that the support found in these programs is crucial to ensuring that the graduates are able to not only survive, but thrive out in the world. They are on their own but never alone.

We did it!

Just wanted to let everyone know that we have officially raised $305 for Socks and Gloves for our kids at Sovietsk. That's 1 pair of gloves and 3 pairs of winter socks for everyone! Thank you! If you would like to continue to donate, that just means more socks, so feel free.

It's time to start planning a trip

It's time to start planning our next trip to visit the kids at the orphanage in Sovietsk, Kirov, Russia for this coming October! Ticket prices are low right now, and we are hoping to nail down dates quickly so we can save some money on airfare. We want anyone who wishes to come along, so we thought we'd let you know as soon as possible.

Tickets are lower in the fall, and they are MUCH lower if we can buy them well in advance. At this point, they are $876--half of what we paid last year. We are looking into other options for further discounts as well.

There is plenty of time between now and October to raise some money, so please don't let funds intimidate you. If you know someone who may be interested, feel free to let them know. We would love to have a big team of visitors for the kids this year!

The Third Wish

The last of the Three Wishes from Sovietsk staff was this:

Please pray for the boys and girls who need to finish this school year well, for the graduates to find their way in life, and for the director and staff who take care of the children.
Ben's brother often quotes Tito Colliander, saying "Prayer is action." I know we have a diverse group of readers, and I expect no two of us pray the same or even believe the same. So I am pondering what 'prayer is action' may mean to our kids at Sovietsk . . .

The boys and girls need to finish this school year well. Some of our kids are on the verge of leaving school without graduating--we have17 and 18 year old ninth graders, on their last chances. A 15 year old girl wrote she was having difficulty with her studies, but she is working hard and 'hop[ing she] will cope with everything.' She has so much to cope with . . . here in the US, we hear all the time how parental involvement is a huge factor in academic success. The kids at Sovietsk deal with developmental challenges and emotional barriers, with so many of their basic human needs lacking, and without parental support. They need love, encouragement, and help. They are trying to learn not only math and language and science, but discipline and problem solving and a healthy mix of trust and independence. They need strong, dedicated adults as mentors, tutors, cheerleaders, and unconditional friends.

For the graduates to find their way in life takes more of the same. They are so young, and they are expected to navigate an adult world without the emotional or financial support of a family. The odds are truly stacked against them: 50% of orphan graduates in Russia live on crime, 30% eat with money earned through prostitution, 60% cope through drugs or alcohol, and 15% are unable to cope and end their own lives.

The directors and staff know this, and they do all they can to help the children learn to live and love. I can hardly imagine the burden of filling a mother's role for 28 children with extreme emotional needs. This is why the directors partner with other people who care, and this is why they send special requests for letters, for warm clothes, for extra prayer and support.

So, through the prayers and actions of Sovietsk supporters, our kids have more adults in their lives: coaches, tutors, music and arts and crafts teachers, and disciplers Lena and Ann. They have friends a world away who express genuine and unconditional concern. They have opportunities to study within their strengths, whether medicine, science, driving, or language. They have a place to come home to when they go on to tech school, as Galina maintains an open home for the graduates. But there is so much more to do . . .

I have focused quite a bit on the positive things happening at Sovietsk, and we are so thankful for the positive impact you have had as generous donors and supporters. But I think it is time to unveil some of the more painful realities of institutional living. As I begin to share more and more about our kids, please consider how our prayers, and our actions, can shape their futures. We would love to hear your thoughts about what else we can do to help our kids at Sovietsk meet a brighter future.

Baby, It's Cold Outside!

In Indiana, we just experienced a major cold snap. Temperatures were well below zero, and windchills were worse. It was COLD!

After some conversation with one of many homeless individuals in our city, my husband was without a pair of gloves to wear. So, we braved the miserable cold for a trip to Target to pick up another pair. It was just that easy.

Not everyone can do that--not people who have no transportation, no warm clothes to wear out, no money to purchase what they need to survive the winter. Our kids at Sovietsk can't do that, and with tight finances, the staff can't always provide everything they'd like. Which brings us to our Second Wish: warm socks and gloves for all our kids.

Winter is here and there is a great need here for warm clothes, especially warm socks and warm gloves.

It would be silly to spend our time and resources for an expensive shipment of socks and gloves to Russia, so we are collecting money instead. We are having a Sock and Glove Drive! We'd love to raise $280, which should be enough to buy socks and gloves for all the kids at Sovietsk. We know times are tight, but most of us can spare $5. Would you please consider throwing some cash in the pot, then sharing our wish with your friends and family? You can donate through the tab on the right--it's quick, easy, and painless. The best part is watching it grow--$5 here and there becomes $280 and another few years of warmth in Russia. The kids will receive items warm enough for Russian winters, then share these items and care for them diligently, maximizing every bit of usefulness. It's the Russian way.

We encourage you to look around your city and see who else needs some warmth. This time of year, it can be a matter of life and death. There are opportunities everywhere--assisting with heating bills, donating clothes and blankets, lending a hand or some cash to shelters who house people and serve warm food, and the list goes on. We hope that all of you stay warm as well!

Ivan and Ilya

Last August, I met a couple of interesting young guys who were living at Sovietsk Orphanage and I thought I'd share with you a little bit about them. They're a pair of brothers called Ivan and Ilya. They were shy around us just like most of the kids, so we didn't get to spend as much time getting to know them as we would have liked. But I know a little bit about them. They're energetic, full of life, and they have lots of personality. But they've not had an easy life--I think that much is probably obvious given that they live in an orphanage--but things are looking up for them. Through the generous support of the KidsFirst Foundation, Ivan and Ilya and several other of the young men there were able to take driving lessons and obtain their drivers license. Galina, the kind director of the orphanage, told us that she didn't have to worry about these guys now because they can earn a living on their own. (That's a big deal, because Galina worries constantly about all of the children there.) Having the ability to drive opens up many opportunities for jobs. In addition, the boys had to prove that they could behave responsibly in order to take the lessons in the first place. Galina treated the driving lessons as a privilege that the guys had to earn. She was proud to tell us that they had lived up to her expectations. Another thing I know about Ivan and Ilya is that they're still very young and even though they can now earn a decent living, it doesn't mean that they don't need the emotional and moral support that comes from friendship. These young men don't have anyone to write to them. A great way to build a relationship with these guys and to offer them support is through exchanging letters. I can't emphasize enough how dearly these kids treat the correspondences that they receive. They're read and re-read them a thousand times. How would you feel if you knew that someone an ocean away thought enough of you to sit down and write a note to tell you that they were thinking about you. Pretty good, I'll wager.

Q & A

A lovely reader asked a few questions I thought the rest of you might also want to know. So . . .

Can children write?
Yes! Please! The kids LOVE hearing from children in the US and learning about the differences between cultures. Some families all write together, some parents help children write their own letters, some kids do it all on their own. Some write to a child in their age range, others write to an older child. This is a GREAT activity for kids!

Can we write in English?
Yes! You can either send an email to HopeChest or mail a letter to HopeChest, in English, and they will have it translated into Russian before they send it to the kids. The kids will receive the English letter, the Russian translation, and any photos or drawings you send along. Each child has a specific number that should be included on all correspondence, which helps ensure the right letters get to the right kids. If you're interested, email me and I'll get you the contact information.

We do have at least one brave soul who writes in Russian . . .

How do the letters get to the kids?
Our disciplers, Lena and Ann, deliver the letters. They help a lot with translation, too. If you send an email, HopeChest will forward it to them. If you send letters via mail, travelers to Russia will hand-deliver them to the Russian staff, who will make sure they are translated and get them where they need to go. Obviously, email is much faster.

Any other questions, send them our way!

The First Wish

So, with the new year we have Three Wishes for Sovietsk. The first is to have someone writing regular letters to each child at Sovietsk:

They are really happy when they receive letters from you.It would be very nice if you continue writing to them, and if possible to them all, as some of them are a bit envious that to some children come 3 or 4 letters in a month.

Caregiver Irina's words made us so happy--we are glad you are continuing to write, and we thank you so much! But we are sad to share that a number of kids, some new to the orphanage and some waiting a long time, are not receiving letters.

For example, Oksana, the first girl in the picture, was waiting over a year in our program before she began receiving letters. She now has a sponsor and some American friends who write to her. She is a very sweet girl who was quite shy when we met her, and I look forward to seeing her personality grow as she begins to understand just how special she is.

The other girls, Katya and Larisa, are sisters who are new to Sovietsk. When we visited last August, they were staying at a family home in Dolbiylova as a transition to the orphanange. Though the orphanage staff welcomed them warmly, I cannot imagine the challenge and disappointment of moving from family life to institutional life. These sweet girls do not have American pen pals, and I am hoping that will change soon.

Will you please consider committing to write regularly to one of our kids? Will you please share this opportunity with friends and family? It is free and easy. You could become a full sponsor, but the letters are most important. If you email me, I will be glad to answer any questions and get you started. When you choose a child, I will share with you his or her age, grade in school, hobbies and interests, and any special challenges he or she faces. We will give you guidelines and ideas for letter writing, and all you have to do is type a quick and heartfelt email. It means more to the kids than you can understand!

Take Tania, for example. We met her in August. She has graduated and left the orphanage, but she was back to visit for the holidays. (Galina is very generous, allowing the graduates to treat the orphanage as their home if they follow the rules.) I was so happy to hear from her! A major purpose of our programs is to keep the kids connected to people who care about them once they leave the orphanage and enter a very dangerous world. Thanks to Tania's sponsors and her relationships at Sovietsk, she is in a better place than many other graduates. She says:

I'm writing to you with great pleasure and in a very good mood. Now I'm studying in Novovyatsk. I like my studies. I am going to become a master of joinery and furniture work.
I like to make embroidery. I've made a lot of pictures already. I think you were told about my works when you visited us.
I can imagine your impression from visiting another country. I also want to visit some other country. I remember my visit to Kirov though I was only 7. We were taken to the local circus. It produced a great impression on me because I had seen wild animals for the first time.
I was also very happy to communicate with you. Everything was so interesting to me.
Good bye.
With love and tender hug,
Tatyana

*A special welcome to our new readers from the Kirov Yahoo group. We're glad you're here!

Christmastime is Here

Yes, our Russian Orthodox friends are just preparing for Christmas. Here is what Lena shares about Christmas in Russia:

Christmas has an interesting history in Russia. After the 1917 Revolution, Christmas was banned throughout Russia, along with other religious celebrations. It wasn't until 75 years later, in 1992, that the holiday was openly observed. Today, it's once again celebrated in grand fashion, with the faithful participating in an all-night Mass in incense-filled cathedrals and churches.

Christmas in Russia is celebrated on January 7th in accordance with the old Julian calendar. A 40 day Nativity Fast (no meat, no dairy, no sweets) accompanies the preparation for this joyous event. On the Eve of Christmas, it is traditional for all family members to gather to share a special meal to honor the coming of Christ. However, the festivities only begin with the first star appearing in the sky. A lot of the kids from the orphanages go to the Christmas Liturgy service at an Orthodox church on the morning of the 7th. In preparation for Christmas disciplers do a lot of lessons with the kids focused on the meaning and significance of Christmas.

To say “Merry Christmas” in Russian you say “S Rozhdestvom!”

So, we will be feasting in our home next week, in honor of our Russian friends. Please remember the children of Sovietsk this week, when the loss of family can feel especially painful. If you haven't already, you could send a letter. You could donate to keep them warm (see Sock and Glove Drive on the right). You could become a sponsor, the person who sees that he or she is not forgotten. You can pray for their hearts to be warm and light with the love of Christmas Day.

S Rozhdestvom to you and yours!

If you turn your volume up, you will hear Rachmaninoff's Bogoroditse Dievo, a Russian Ave Maria from his Choral Vespers.

Photo Credit: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/39/83066493_d1232b9371.jpg?v=0